slayboybunny:

every now and my cat does something very human like and i get very nervous and ask him “are you a person trapped in a cat’s body. or did you choose this body” very seriously to see if this time he will communicate with me and he always kinda looks to the side and then does what i imagine to be a person doing a bad impression of a cat and it makes me so nervous cuz  i do way too much weird shit around my cat for him to actually be a dude pretending to be a cat

knitmeapony:

egobus:

one time when I was about four, the 10 year old neighbour boys attacked me with water guns and when I ran away and told my mom she gave me the hose and set it to pressure wash and basically told me to finish what they started  

Excellent parenting.

kafkai:

dilated:

I automatically assume everyone finds me unattractive until they tell me otherwise.

And then i assume that they are lying to make fun of me

demiohgod:

James: Lily’s pregnant

Remus: are you serious?!

*crash*

*cat screech*

James: damnit Remus we talked about this

*glass shattering*

*bang*

*sirius falls through wall*

Sirius: NO BUT I AM

Remus:

James:

Sirius: wait what